I thought today would be a lot sadder for me. It wasn't. There is that old cliche that time heals all wounds. When you are in the thick of it, you don't want to hear that, but it is true. Our sweet puppy that we had for just 11 months and was a little over a year old died a year ago today. She was struck by a car after running outside after a bird. The events that followed, I will never forget. That day, Daisy's story came to be. One puppy taught so many people to find the joy and to remember what is really important in this life. I will be forever grateful for the memory of our sweet girl. There are times I still think about her and shed a tear or two, but the horror of that day and the heartbreak really has faded. What a gift it is from God to have time. I do not believe that there is "time" in Heaven like there is here one Earth, but we are so blessed to have "time" to move us forward in life, experience new things, appreciate other things, and have space in between the really bad things that happen to us.
Today was just a day. Not a sad day. Very much like a year ago today, the boys had swim lessons. But unlike a year ago where going to swim lessons was the thing I needed to do to keep breathing and being able to not crumble into a million pieces from our tragedy, today was just about focusing on keeping Connor floating and kicking and watching Joel move through the water with his ever growing arms and legs. Today was about going to the local library for craft time and reading books with the boys. I didn't even cry today like I thought I would. Time has passed, and I absolutely understand my Heavenly Father's plan for me and WHY Daisy had to leave us when she did. I could not possibly have taken care of a dog that needed to go out many times a day to the bathroom and to run around, be fed, brushed, and loved. I was in the hospital so much in the past 12 months that I feel like I missed most of Joel's Kindergarten year. How COULD I have taken care of a sweet animal all the while trying to just survive and take care of my children as much as a did?
Today was about teaching Joel a lesson and figuring out the best way to discipline him for being unkind to his brother. It was a day of shopping and getting shoes for David for church. Today was simply a day....and that is a happy moment. I will always miss my sweet dog, but as we look forward to getting a new one, Daisy's biological sister, I know that Daisy has been looking down on us and reminding me in little ways to continue to live as she would want me to...finding the joy in the little things, like the wind on my face or the laughter of my children. I believe in the past year I have done well to honor Daisy's memory by being the person she thought I was. Have a blessed night!
Today was just a day. Not a sad day. Very much like a year ago today, the boys had swim lessons. But unlike a year ago where going to swim lessons was the thing I needed to do to keep breathing and being able to not crumble into a million pieces from our tragedy, today was just about focusing on keeping Connor floating and kicking and watching Joel move through the water with his ever growing arms and legs. Today was about going to the local library for craft time and reading books with the boys. I didn't even cry today like I thought I would. Time has passed, and I absolutely understand my Heavenly Father's plan for me and WHY Daisy had to leave us when she did. I could not possibly have taken care of a dog that needed to go out many times a day to the bathroom and to run around, be fed, brushed, and loved. I was in the hospital so much in the past 12 months that I feel like I missed most of Joel's Kindergarten year. How COULD I have taken care of a sweet animal all the while trying to just survive and take care of my children as much as a did?
Today was about teaching Joel a lesson and figuring out the best way to discipline him for being unkind to his brother. It was a day of shopping and getting shoes for David for church. Today was simply a day....and that is a happy moment. I will always miss my sweet dog, but as we look forward to getting a new one, Daisy's biological sister, I know that Daisy has been looking down on us and reminding me in little ways to continue to live as she would want me to...finding the joy in the little things, like the wind on my face or the laughter of my children. I believe in the past year I have done well to honor Daisy's memory by being the person she thought I was. Have a blessed night!
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