Day 121

I have this little surgery ritual (yes, it has become a ritual because doing it 5 times this year makes it so lol) When the nurses lead me into the surgery room and I lay down on the bed, the oxygen mask is placed on my face.  The doctor tells me to breath.  In those last few moments of consciousness, I say a little prayer, always the same, and always with the same intense fear.  "Dear Father in Heaven, I know that in a few moments I am going to be asleep, but please Father, please let me wake up and be healed and be home with my family once more." Today as I am ticking down the time until surgery number 5, I thought a lot about that prayer and REALLY focused on the happy moments.

I figured I would post my happy moment blog now because let's face it, there are NO more happy moments after waking up from surgery...lots of surges of pain FREE moments after I push the call button for the nurse to come and shoot me up again, but moments that are not, in my opinion, HAPPY.

I started off my morning with my two boys.  I did their laundry, fed them their breakfast, and spent some time soothing Joel's sadness.  He KNOWS by now what a surgery day means, and this time he was pretty sad to have mommy go to the hospital.  I told him he will have a fun time with his babysitter and friends and grandparent's, but I feel pretty sad too.  My HAPPY moment was getting to hold him and wipe away his little tears and just be a MOM in those precious moments.  I got to bring him breakfast and give him lots of kisses...it feels really good to be told "I love you mommy."

Then we were off to speech therapy for Connor (where my son's speech therapist, and my boss gave me a present for a future mani-pedi...looking forward to that!)  Connor is talking so much more now and I am so grateful for patient women willing to work with 2 year olds and all that it entails to do so to help them communicate with their mommies more!  Getting to BE one of those people on both sides has truly been a treat this year and made me MUCH more focused on getting my clients to talk more :-)

We ended our afternoon with some lunch and playtime at McDonalds.  Such a fun time watching them eat and play and laugh. I soaked up as much precious little boy time as I could get today!  Connor loves to slide and there were boys there playing with Joel.  Fun was had by all and then we came home.

Now I am at home waiting for my dear friend and Pampered Chef consultant to pick me up and take me to the hospital.  We have been wanting to get together for SO long now!  I will make the best of the time we spend driving to the hospital and waiting for the nurses to get me ready.  I feel really blessed to have someone who would drive all the way across the county just to see me and spend some time with me....must be doing something right to have that kind of friend!

And so I bid you all a farewell for today.  Keep me in your prayers readers.  Just picture me lying on the operating table, with an oxygen mask over my face, and a prayer in my heart.